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Saturday, April 18, 2009

CHATSWOOD: Longing for the Sales, Payton L. Inkletter, better Late than never, beeLines Leighward to the ABC Shop, looking for A Moore lovely business

Be all that as it may, meanwhile:

In other news…

18th April 2009:

Saturday: As I said last entry, sleep was eight hours away, even though dawn had arrived. Oh, shoot! it’s Sarrerdi! Yippee, we Inkletter’s love Sarrerdis, not for any religious reasons, no, but just because another week’s obligations have almost bitten the dust.

I’m writing this particular entry a day and a half later, so already I’m battling to recall the particulars of how my eight hours unfolded, but I think a kitchen clean up was definitely one job, and watering the back bamboos another. What did take time was my decision to phone Optus and get the lowdown on an upgrade to a higher data limit, and after a million transfers as well as the usual wrestle with a computer generated female voice at the outset, I left with information that was tempting. I promised in last Thursday’s diary entry that I would let my daily billions of readers know what I ended up doing or not doing, so you waited for it, and now you will know…

I upgraded! I spend twenty more scarce bucks to get another 13 gigs of high speed data before I’m throttled back to 128 kbs. The beauty of this arrangement is that I can downgrade any month to where I was before, without affecting our two year contract, and only have to pay for the month or months of extra data at twenty extra smackeroos. So I’m risking little, and having the joyful experience of fast loading of pages for much longer, and continuing my Librivox audio book downloading 24/7. One of the last chicks (I’m not sexist…) I spoke to at Optus offered to email me the latest bundle plans from Optus called dinglehopper-YAS!FUSION-kickmalarky (or similar), which I accepted out of politeness. However, when I opened the pdf document and took a gander, I began to get very very interested. Apart from not knowing enough about non GSM mobile phones yet, the top deal for 129 buckminsters a month seems right up our laneway. The upgrade I just took today brings our bundle cost monthly to 109 buckminsteroos, and the phone side of things is lousy, in our considered opinion. But if we take their Unlimited Broadband usage plan for 129 little ones, it seems all the phone calls we are ever likely to make are included, and are unlimited as well. Except non GSM mobbles, and the problem is, I don’t know yet how we would know in advance if we were to phone such a mobble; more to find out. I did read the fine print and got a shock, passed out, and had to be revived with the fumes of Cutty Sark to learn that on the cheaper 4, 10, and 20 Gb broadband plans it is easily possible to find oneself up for an extra 300, yes, 300 smackeroos a month if 2 gigs of excess usage data from the broadband side is consumed above the limits for those plans. Charging at 15 cents per Mb, 2000 Mb, which I could bring down in hours if I unthrottled my dedicated downloader Netants, and 300 extra bucks goes to Optus thank you very much. Only after this draconian trap does the throttle back of speed kick in, and no further data charges apply. And I note that in the fine print the total cost of $300 doesn’t get a mention, only the $0.15 per Mb for the next 2 Gb; very f-----g clever Optus! Anyway, I’ll make another call to the refined bastards and learn what I can about non GSM mobiles, and if Australia has them, how to know in advance, or failing that, see if they can be blocked from being connected (I’ll bet not, and not for technical reasons – too lucrative!), or if they can be recognized by prefix. Rest assured, I’ll eventually update the billions of you fine folk who check in here daily for the latest edge-of-the-seat happenings in the lives of the Inkletters.

My sweetheart Missus Inklebarelyconcealedlust made me a huge platter of sliced apples and dragonfly wing shavings of cheese, er, no, that’s tomorrow, today it was chunks of baked ricotta, and a mug of coffee, and we nattered in the lounge while I consumed these victuals. Finally the Sheila Monster tucked me into her boudoir just after two, and she set off to the shops, the DVD library, and various places. Later after her eventual return one of the Deeler sons came and picked up the second meal Janny had made this week for them while they struggle to cope with Meg’s cancer treatment. I didn’t quite sleep the whole time, hearing Janny’s return, and calling out like a baby, she came and smothered me with kisses again, checked my nappy, retucked me in, and this time, maybe about half three, I finally fell into the intoxicating embrace of Mistress Nodette, my nightly lover whom the alabaster dragon tolerates…


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