BENCUBBIN: Lack of the good oil on where to buy wooden sandals incenses Payton L. Inkletter: thus tempted to drown his frustrations in the dirty acre.

Be all that as it may, meanwhile:

In other news…

04^th April 2009:

Saturday: Well, as I said last entry, my ecstasy in the arms of Mistress Nodette was going to be cut too short, and it was, by Missus Inkleit’stimetotakemeandPapreeeverywhere – likeyouwereforewarned, who came into the boudoir with the news that it was time to salute the sun, already arching into its westward plunge into the Indian Ocean. It took me an hour to come to a semblance of life, then… oh, hey, it’s Sarrerdi! … er, yes, then we drove to pick up Pa pree and set off in the direction of the Darling Ranges, that monobrow on our eastern horizon, strangely suggestive of Britain’s Chancellor of the Exchequer, until we found ourselves in Benara Fresh Markets, going beserk buying fruit and vegetables. Thank God for Benara Fresh Markets! How else would we sup on apples, pears, purple spuds, you name it.

From here I drove the delinquents to Girrawheen, where firstly they relieved themselves of some dollars in The Reject Shop (where Janny got me), before doing some essential selections in VideoEzy for their week’s fix of DVDs. While waiting in the car for the little people, I must have raised a number of eyebrows from the folk parked near and walking past, for I did a photo shoot of Payton the Koala Bear in the passenger seat of the Swift, from the driver’s seat, with today’s The West Australian newspaper and its TV guide, called ‘Seven Days’. If these wide steering ponces really got to know me, they’d have their worst fears confirmed… The reason I did the photo shoot was because Koala Sam, burned in the recent Victorian Black Saturday fires, was on the front page, and in a rare double whammy of interest to moi, Natalie Imbruglia was on the front page of Seven Days. Long term readers of Fool’s Paradise will recall, approaching two years ago, that Natalie left a message in my Visitors’ Book, and helped herself to tasting my luscious muffins. For those in doubt, I have the photographic evidence, in the various archives linked to the main site.

Not over yet, I next delivered the brats to the local Dewsons’ where they finished their orgy of spending, before finally getting back home toward six. Another half afternoon evaporated. I unloaded the boot of its booty, and hit the sack for an hour, when Missus Inklealarmclock woke me for vittles and My Beloved, and by a little after eight o’clock I hit the sack again for a couple of more hours, sleeping for over half of it I estimate. Again Missus Inklealarming woke me by arrangement, and I titivated while waking up, then delivered Pa pree home about eleven.

On my return Missus InkleI’llkillhimwithkindnessifit’sthelasthingi’lldo had a plate of sliced pears and shavings of mature cheddar ready for me to consume, with a mug of coffee. We chatted about the day, the week, life in general, in the lounge while I dutifully consumed said victuals, and watched a bit of Rage on Aunty, given that it was hosted by the funny and quirky Lawrence Leung. I put the alabaster dragon to bed with an all over massage using her whiz bang Homedics ‘Compact Percussion Massager’ to use its official title, now a member of the Inkletter family for but a day, and she loved it. I had earlier used it again on my dicky left thigh, and I am sold on its effects.

I wrote this diary entry, and struggled for a while of course with a paralysed computer on a big go slow, and it only recovers when I kill Firefox; I suppose some Java thingy or some add on must grind this system to the speed of a turtle on marijuana. I fought with the usual health problems, then set out on a late late walk on this mild windyish night. It was a tonic to get out and about, although I must admit I look with greater solicitude at loiterers these days, and there was a fellow at the shops’ bus shelter who seemed to have not a lot of reason to be there.

Once back I did a partial clean up in the kitchen, the delinquents having made a bit of a mess today, then came back to the poota to write more and make a new header from today’s photo shoot with Payton the Koala Bear. Which I did, and uploaded it, before tackling three, yes three, more dual postings of this diary, days stored on the hard drive and needing editing. This took forever to do, and in fact it was well after eight in the morning before they were done, what with the slight editing of a couple of previous posts as well. I am looking at a blaze of sunshine on the bamboo leaves out the window as I type. I will be out there soon watering before hitting the low thread count poly cottons.

Which watering I did, but not before being seized with the desire, so strong it caused the intention of the desire to happen, to mow the back lawn. After this fit of activity was over, I gave the lawn a hand soaking, as well as most of the bamboos. A glorious April day was underway…

+paytontedwithlove+